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[Feb. 28th, 2006|03:23 pm] |
yesterday after leaving the library i saw my Mom at the park see her their it made my day i did not expect it. i was so glad to see her. we just sat their talk about what was going on. i told her about work and other things that i was dealing with. then we back back home then i saw my sister she was in one of her moods. my Mon needed some help so i help her move some stuff. it made me fell better to help. left for about two hours got back then my questions when they got home, yesterday i try to have her tell me well she did not talk to me. when i have a attide it not ok but when she has it is i it i don,t get it. so i just did not say anything then she got mad at me, don,t get it sometimes i don,t know what to so i don,t say anything. then i went to Bed. Thought maybe she did not to be round me. it seems like i do everthing wrong. that why i love work so much their i don,t have deal with people.
Their was only one person that i could truly count on if i needed something. he never sad i was wrong i could count on him we was always their. i could always count on him for anything. Know i can only count on myself i try to let people in a maybe could understand me more how i was feeling, it seem like i have to talk all the time to people that i don't when i don't feel like it. Know one understand me. so i keep it to myself.
someone said, that was not good, but if no understand me it wont do any good to talk to people. that does think like me. and still don,t me even when i talk to them. i don,t know what to do so i get sad and just what to be alone. i don,t what anybody just try to say things to make them feel better because the don,t understand me.
Right know i have to deal with so much stuff by myself. i just need some advise i don't know what to do anymore. my life been hard. I always had my Dad when i need him to sopport. when i lost him i just did not know what to do so i did not anything for about two years after he died. i did not talk to anybody about it i did not what anybody to know. it was hard for me, and it still. i have trouble with things i don't what anybody to know about because i don't what they are going to say or do so i keep it to myself. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 27th, 2006|04:16 pm] |
This is my first entry. i don't know what to write so write do what i did
this weekend. On friday work was cool i had fun. then found out our checks had not got there. but is ok i had money i the bank i saved. it hard to save money. someone at work ask if i wanted to go out ofter work i sad cool. went to mall he bought sunglasses. then we went to hot topic found out that one of the girls that work there has a boyfriend that liked but that ok. and then went back to work pick up my check and bought lunch. that night me and my roommate's went to best buy like you do ever friday seeing if there is any new anime to buy. and just went to some other stores. then we got home and played some ddr workout mode.
later that night i wrote a note to my Friend because i felt like i was about to do something i re grate. saturday was cool got up at 5:00am then i went found out i did not have to be there in tell 7:00 oops. it was cool though. Got to work had lots of fun. I love my job. i get to be around toy. and then i thought i had to get off at 3:30pm but i got off at 2:30pm. got of went around town. ofter i got off my firend was in a bad mood i did know how to help. i felt like i did something wrong. but it was ok later we talk. about 10:00pm went to play games. it was cool but some people made me mad. but it whas ok other words. got home about one everthing was cool at home. Got up went to work. then i got off and we went out for lunch at red robin. I had and chicken burger it was good it had pinapple i love pinapple. then we went to hastings and then the mall. played one of the best games of maverl vs capcom 2 i ever had. later that night i did not fell like myself i got. real sad and i felt like i did what to be around any more. the thing i was worried happen. i made someone i care about mad at me. for something i have a hard time dealing with. but hopefuly i can found some help to get me throw this hardest time in my life. then i just felt like crap and did not what to be around any more just to make it easyer. it getting harder and harder to control my feelings. i hope i can i just what to be alone so i do hurt anybody. i hate whemn i fell like that. then i went to bed sad and alone again. i hope i can found somebody likes me. today i got up fell like carp. then i got to work everbody at work make me fell good. l love my job.
That what my weekend was like. |
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